Tag Archives: farts

Search engine terms.

Last night I decided to do something I haven’t done in a while: monitor the search terms by which people find my blog.

Here are a few of my favorites:

  • Gargamel (This bad boy generated 138 views so far!)
  • accep tulip (Maybe I could “accept” one?)
  • cyanide and happiness fart
  • toothpaste cyanide (What are you people planning?)
  • thunderbird for cheap pay (Sorry to disappoint you.)
  • farting in the office
  • swine flu cover up for something else (Like Captain Trips? Then you’re in the right place!)
  • luis exposito (This just makes me laugh.)
  • start shaving (How dare you tell me how to live my life?)
  • whole foods ethel (I do love Whole Foods.)
  • professional beauty products (Again, sorry to disappoint.)
  • pugs toothpastefordinner punched (What kind of sick people are you that you want to punch pugs?)
  • alopecia Asian comics (LOL)
  • the factors that influence a consumer to spend money and time at ethel’s.
  • jelly wrestling lolcat (I wish!)

So there you have it. Apparently the people looking for my blog enjoy shopping for professional beauty products online, reading internet comics, farting, Gargamel, tulips, purchasing cars and telling racist jokes about people with physical defects.

Now I just need to meet this Luis Exposito character and my life will be complete.

He's a catcher, apparently.

According to the Baseball Cube, he’s a minor league prospect for the Red Sox. Okay, sounds great, but how did someone searching for him find my blog? I did a Google search, and my blog comes up on the ninth page. How is this possible? I haven’t written about the guy until today.

Now I have a goal in my life: meet and confront Luis Exposito, and ask him why a Google search for him sent someone to my blog.

Online comics.

I have been getting back into reading online comics every day. My favorites:

cyanide and happiness

By far, my favorite web comic ever is toothpaste for dinner. I read it every day, sometimes more than once, sometimes –GASP– I read it for an hour while procrastinating, when I should be studying for Religion and News Seminar. I don’t know anything about the person who writes it (or should it be “draws”), but there is sometimes a crudely-drawn pug involved, and very often the events take place in an office. When I was stuck behind a desk (a year of my life, wasted), I would always take the time to go through the archives every morning and read one of the office comics, just to make myself feel a little better about my situation. Whoever writes it is consistently funny. Por ejemple:

Best part of that is what the ticket says: “What did you even eat?”