You people never cease to amaze me.

Here are the search terms that referred people to my blog this week:

  • possum sitting (Aw!)
  • mom and baby possum (Double aw!)
  • ethel loves him + cartoon
  • wordpress ethel (Someone searched for me! Someone knows I exist!)
  • who wrote the hey song (Gary Glitter. Duh.)
  • i’m wide awake, it’s morning wordpress his mother mom stroke relationship young college life (Wha?)
  • claiming to give 110 percent (Those 110 percent-ers. Oh, those silly geese.)
  • baby girl possum (Lots of possum searches, huh?)
  • never give 110 percent (Of course, “never give 110 percent.” You never give 110 percent because it’s humanly impossible. But hopefully that person read my post and understands that now.)
  • is there such thing as 110 percent (No.)
  • do dead possums explode (…)

Okay, let’s dwell on that last one for a moment. Someone somewhere is sitting in their house, either in front of a computer or with a cell phone in hand, and suddenly he or she just happens to wonder, “Do dead possums explode?”

Hmm, let’s see.

Does the dead possum have any large, open wounds, either from an animal or motor vehicle impact? If the dead possum has a large wound, this may prevent the explosion.

Did you try shoving a stick of dynamite inside of the dead possum? Although this isn’t the most natural way to make your dead possum explode, it sure does the trick.

Did you try putting the dead possum in the microwave? I’ve heard that certain things will explode when placed in a microwave. Maybe the same holds true for a dead possum.

One last suggestion on how to test the explosiveness of a dead possum: jump on it. If it’s been decaying for awhile, there may be gases built up inside of it. If you jump on it, it may detonate the gases, causing an explosion. (Just make sure to wear your galoshes.)

“Don’t blow us up, please!”

I hope you all aren’t taking me seriously. I would never want someone to blow up a possum.


10 responses to “You people never cease to amaze me.

  1. That baby possum picture spawns nightmares. They may be little and cute, but they all have their mouths open like they’re screaming “REDRUM!!!!” unless you shut the box, or feed them. Whatever comes first. ::shudder::
    I hope this doesn’t spawn even more strange possum comments.

  2. Wasn’t your first post about how the stroking of college freshmen had an inverse relation to a mother’s lucidity first thing in the morning?

  3. That’s funny….i get ALL the weird key words that bring people to my blog as well. It’s strange how it comes up with the most “un-thought” of search terms. Anyways…thanks for checking out my blog and commenting. I’m grateful you took the time to read it. 🙂

  4. I’ve been scrolling through many of your posts, all of which made me laugh. Finally, when I reached the possum picture, I had to stop and comment. Good stuff, Kristin. Thanks for the entertainment.

  5. Pingback: Fun in public bathrooms. | Ethel.

  6. Hello I have also reached your blog by searching for photo’s of baby possums.
    I have been reading you blog for about 20 minutes now and it is quite funny.
    Good day.

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